Marinate in my Nut Mylk

DEAR ABBY:

My conservative lawyer mother takes off her Manolos and wears her vegan canvas Toms slippers around the house when she thinks no one is looking. People say she may be a closet leftie liberal. I thought I might stock the kitchen with raw granola and get her a hybrid SUV to show my support. Do you think she will appreciate the gesture or think I’m a nutcase?

Signed,

Heather Headgear

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Dear Heather,

Sounds like your allowance is on par with the annual fiscal income of a small country! Way to work that karmic abundance, baby! Some people make their mothers raw-vegan-organic cookies to show their support, but I like the Hybrid car idea... better yet, ELECTRIC or HYDROGEN! Maybe even a bicycle? Or a broomstick? Wait - scratch that - your mom’s only a lawyerhalf the time.

If you’ve got the GREEN honey, go for it!

While a new car is a lovely gesture, the way to anyone’s heart is through her/his stomach. If you want to express your heartfelt love and gratitude in the kitchen, here are a few tips from the inner recesses of my gut:

Gastronomic adventures like slurping electrolyte-rich coconut water and scarfing down cashew-cheesy kelp pasta will splatter sunshine on anyone’s lackluster palate. Luscious undulating waves of creamy raw goodness send shivers down my chakras and elevate my consciousness. Did you know that when a bushel of kale, a splash of olive oil and some sea salt meet a 400 degree oven for 10 minutes they make a delicious, nutritious love child platter of crunchy baked kale chips that taste so good they make you wanna KISS yo’ mama? There are SO many ways to show gratitude to your mom and heal body, mind and soul at the same time with delectable, organic, sustainable edibles from your locally grown produce section. Get conscious and get yo’ grub on, my healthy homie!

Coconut Covered Smooches,

Abbylicious